The book is called “About Natalie, A Daughter’s Addiction, a mothers love, finding their way back to each other.” CHRISTINE NAMAN is the author of Faces of Hope: Babies Born on 9/11, Faces of Hope: Ten Years Later,

Faces of Hope at Eighteen, Caterpillar Kisses, Christmas Lights, The Novena, and The Believers.

She then took her abilities as an author to write a book about her struggles in dealing with a daughter who abused drugs. Her daughter, Natalie, participated in writing poems that are included in the book.

Love is very unique in terms of defining it. Is it a feeling defined as an emotional state or reaction. Maybe an emotion as a state of mind deriving from one's circumstances, mood. The problem with those are that they come and go and change and aren’t factually based. But love can’t work the same otherwise I could love you today, maybe tomorrow and then lose it later. We know that the part of the brain where our emotional control center is located which is in the limbic system. Which is a piece of the old part of our brain.

We tend to identify love most often with euphoria, but that isn’t the only emotion we feel that is tied to love. We do know that other feelings are created based on love

Ecstasy, compassion, surprise, anxiety, anger, jealousy, despair: we can fly all over the place as we swing from high to low all within this love.

Love almost has bi-polar qualities as a cyclic mood disorder.

What about love being defined as a drive?

There have been studies within brain scans that have shown where they believe this motivational drive comes from. Love is a need, and a drive. Like all drives, love is orchestrated in the reward system, in the old brain where the limbic system is, but also further back in the brain stem.

This is involuntary reflexes like breathing and heart rate.

The part of the brain that has no cognitive function which may be why it’s nearly impossible to control this primitive passion.

Maybe this insight can actually help us understand why love gets removed from the equation when we are abusing drugs. It also can cause us to see the real correlation with a dependency on the need for love.

If that part of the brain sounds familiar, its because it should.

The Primitive and old part of our brain is where drugs and alcohol and all behavioral addictions have their effect.

If drugs hijack that part of the brain, that drug almost seems to become love and since our brain has limits, love for others may get tossed aside.

Please check out her website at:

https://aboutnatalieaddictioncomfort.com/

Janey Lee Grace is an author, commentator, and is the popular holistic co-host on Steve Wright in the afternoon on BBC Radio 2.

She is the author of five books on Holistic living including the #1 Amazon best seller Imperfectly Natural Woman and currently writes columns for many magazines, and runs training workshops and consultations on Media Breakthrough for holistic businesses.

She hosts a podcast called "Alcohol free life," and gave a TED talk called "Sobriety rocks-who knew!" She runs "The Sober Club" inspiring others to focus on optimum health and wellbeing underpinned by sobriety.

Her newest book is "Happy Healthy Sober: Ditch the booze and take control of your life."

Sobriety refers to a decision to stay away from alcohol but in the context of the recovery world today is used interchangeably with any substance use.

The reasons why people make this decision varies across the board and as a counselor in the substance abuse field, I am always curious on those reasons because that motivation will literally make them or break them.

Whatever brought you to that decision is perfect in the beginning but as I have said many times that people get sober because of what they do not want but stay sober because of what they do want.

Join me as we reach out to the U.K. and discuss the substance problem in other areas of the world.

Janey Lee Grace: Author, Commentator, Singer, Radio Personality, and Podcast Host

https://www.thesoberclub.com/

Radio Station

https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/profiles/1LMy9nL32P7QmQBHdT1bbn9/janey-lee-grace

https://twitter.com/janeyleegrace?lang=en

Richard Kaufman is the author of “A hero’s journey, from darkness to light.”

He is the host of a podcast called, “Success: your why, powers your how.” Richard Kaufman has served in our military and was medically retired after 23 years of service.

One of his mission's was to support Operation Enduring freedom.

In 2001, George W. Bush, our president at that time, issued Operation Enduring freedom which were airstrikes targeting Al-Qaeda and the Taliban in Afghanistan as a direct response to 9/11. This began on Oct 7, 2001 and actually lasted until Dec 31, 2014.

He also fits well with this podcast as he has struggled with substance abuse, homelessness, and alcohol abuse.

Memorial day was about a week ago where we honor the men and women who died while serving in the U.S. military. The military should have a place in all of our hearts. In November, we have veterans day where we celebrate those that have and are fighting for our freedom.

Richard Kaufman is still fighting by "HELPING PEOPLE GET THEIR LIVES BACK."

He is known as the "comeback coach" and offers free services to those in need.

He is a hero who puts his hands out to anybody in need and emphasizes personal responsibility.

Richard Kaufman, " The Comeback Coach" is a Man of True Service. Author of "A Hero's Journey"

#thecomebackcoach

https://www.richardkaufman.net/

Podcast: "Success: Your Why Powers Your How"

Anthony Torres is an author of a new book “Letters to my people, thoughts of a recovering addict.” He is the lead pastor of Mountain View church in New Mexico. He has a lot of similarities to me and many of our listeners. He battled with drug addiction, suffered those same questions of our existence and walked away with many scars and then became a man of faith.

Faith is something that we all struggle with, whether it be faith in you child, your boss, or even faith that we will live until tomorrow. Faith is believing in something that we do not truly understand such as motives, agendas, or anything we can’t judge through our senses. What we see can even be altered requiring a certain amount of faith to believe that it is real. Faith in my judgment or even my feelings since they really are not always accurate.

The bible is by far the most inspirational book ever written whether you believe in it or not. Anthony is a man of love, compassion, and empathy.

Humility is what will save us in this world and it is also very appealing.

The book, “Pain, Failure and Misery are the Stepping Stones to Success,” and even though I didn’t create this based on this quote but “psalms 119 verse 71 says "It was good for me to be afflicted so that I might learn your decrees."

The greatest advocates out there fighting for the good of mankind had to suffer to spread their message of love. Anthony Torres is that example.

Anthony Torres. An Ex-Drug Abuser Who Became A Pastor. Who Would Have Thought? And, an Author

Please check out his book, “Letters to my people, thoughts of a recovering addict.”

https://www.amazon.com/Letters-My-People-Thoughts-Recovering/dp/057889758X/ref=pd_ybh_a_4?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=N0PF65R9Q6WE5B0ST8K0

You can see his sermons at:

https://www.mvcalamo.com/

Facebook:

https://www.facebook.com/anthony.torres.9887

Joe Potosi, who is the author of when the dust settled, between a rock and a hard place shares his pain and loss as a result of COVID. He has over 20 years sober but with things being tough it caused cravings to drink. A powerful discussion on cause and effect.

Cause and effect/ Relapse prevention sits at the core to this idea because we plan for things that will happen, might happen or could happen. Sometimes to plan for the unexpected. When does it become too much, This obviously depends on the person.

a highly debated topic refers to our minds desire to correlate a cause with a belief that it has created a specific effect.

More commonly said, cause and effect. Cause and effect has a basses in a fallacy to logic because we can’t always prove without a reasonable doubt that one thing completely caused the result of another.

I could easily argue that a plane crashed causing the death of the passengers as easily arguable but what about events happening in a persons life causing them to make poor choices later. These are arguments used in courts to get reduced sentences for convicted murderers by arguing that childhood events led them to make the choices they made in the future.

But I also couldn’t argue that this wasn’t the case because just as it is almost impossible to prove cause and effect, it is just as impossible to disprove it because we would have to be able to take all factors into consideration that we can’t see such as the genetic makeup, possible variables regarding their character, traits, personality, and even mental health. Were mental health issues present before the occurrence.

This has been a tough year for many of us, as I can hardly imagine not knowing someone or knowing of someone who has died as it is estimated at over 600,000 deaths.

It is estimated as over 80,000 deaths of drug overdoses in 2020. Financial hardships for many and for those of us in recovery; discomfort, pain, immense sadness, and in some cases unbearable anger can cause a battle within us that I like to call those whispers of Beelzebub and benefactor, the kindly helper.

Paxton Dickerson is a creative man with a powerful strength in pulling people into recovery by getting them inspired, interested, and motivated in finding a better life. He is extremely unique in his tactics as you will be pulled outside the box.

He is the founder of Mechanics of Recovery, a motivational speaker, and I can't avoid the English idiom referring to perfection. I am speaking of his clothes so we must say, "dressed to the nines."

Since most people coming into treatment are seeking to work on a problem that they don’t think they have and learn from someone they don’t think they will learn from, Paxton has the ability and talent to show them otherwise. He is intelligent which makes them not thinking they will learn from someone a difficult task,

Creative people, with new ideas, are who I believe are setting the stage for the greatest success we see in working with those struggling with substance abuse.

Unless I can get someone interested in what we are doing, we are going to struggle in reaching them. Paxton works hard as we are helping these people save their lives.

Paxton Dickerson: Founder of Mechanics of Recovery. The Greatest Dressed Motivational Guru.

Here is his contact information as he can easily be reached.

https://www.instagram.com/dickersonpaxton

www.mechanicsofrecovery.com

https://www.facebook.com/paxton.dickerson.3

I want to show you what I did while early in recovery and battling those horrific cravings. As a fun bonus, we will end this singing "I Bid You Goodnight," by the grateful dead. How many know what I am talking about?

Listen to my message because it may help you. I want to share what I did after spending thirty days in a residential program while attending an outpatient program. What I eventually did, worked for me and this may help others which I hope it does.

For me, staying busy was important since my mind was still foggy but as I spent many years prior to this working with people, there was something I always taught people and it was to use our minds.

I am speaking about creativity. I can actually show you what I am talking about.

Creativity and staying busy was my answer to battling those cravings. I had days that I wanted to say fuck it and disappear again. My depression would creep in. The un-comfortability of relearning to accept that I have feelings and needing to embrace them rather than push them down or in worst case, use meth to numb myself.

As my life story is out there, for the most part, let us make fun of me and tell you a story that I don’t normally run out and tell people and it is the story of my transformation into a woman to prove that police weren't surrounding our complex.

Something that I have found to be soothing, is cracking a joke at my own expense.

I’ve defused a lot of awkward social interactions by poking fun at my past mishaps (of which there are plenty!).

I’m definitely not alone in this, either: Strange as it may sound, many of us are happiest when we can laugh at our past misfortunes and turn them into amusement.

How easily you can do so will depend in part on your disposition.

Science has started to see the value in self-mockery, too. Psychology researchers have discovered that self-deprecating humor has an unintended side effect: It happens to improve our health.

A study published in "Psychology and Individual Differences," stated as people who regularly poke fun at themselves exhibit greater levels of emotional well-being.

My guest today is Paul Berggren, who has had to deal with the absence of his son. Micah. Micah is currently being housed in the Nebraska department of corrections for charges that aren’t specifically drug related but clearly actions taken while under the influence.

Parents sacrifice their time, energy, and existence to focus on another person and raise them to the best of their ability.

Unfortunately, the person that has been focused on tends to lack any appreciation and feels entitled as they nail the parents to a cross for an excruciating sacrifice.

The question I am asked the most by families is “is there hope for my child in staying clean because he or she has failed so many times?”

The answer is always yes. Why is the relapse rate so high for these individuals and where do they go wrong?

They do not have a motivation that they control. Everybody is originally motivated by moving away from a painful experience.

A MOTIVATION FROM PAIN WILL NEVER LAST. These are all temporary consequences that will either resolve themselves or go away.

Once they disappear, using will return and new pain will arise sending them back into the cycle of recidivism.

My guest today is here to share his experience in dealing with his son who has struggled with addiction and is currently in-custody in Nebraska.

We don’t know what his son will do when he gets out but I have been communicating with his son through JPAY.

My guest Paul is here to discuss what he has gone through from the family perspective.

It may be exceedingly difficult to determine how serious someone, whether it be a family member or friend is about getting help because the decision can be very skewed by lack of money, being tired, employment problems, relationship problems, health problems and in our case today, being incarcerated.

When resolved, this may alter their course as they return to their previous lifestyle.

Many children and young adults will learn very early on the person or persons who they can use to manipulate as they use love as the tool to save them from negative consequences.

Drug and alcohol abusers aren’t stupid people and can be great actors, in general, as they will shed tears of sadness for a tank of gas from you and then leave the room with laughter as they hand their dealer the money for a bag of dope.

We all must remember that when we are dealing with someone using, they are not themselves, and are lost in a world where nothing matters but that drug.

Even though you may have unconditional love for your family member, love is not in the equation for that person whom we love and want to save.

They are not requesting your love in most cases, but instead are encouraging material things to be given because of your love.

Many will fear that if we do nothing to help, then the person may die. If you offer help and they refuse to take advantage of it, they may die.

If you continue to help as they have less incentive to change because we can do this again later, will increase the chances of relapse and an untimely death.

“Al-Anon” teaches about detachment, which is to “let go of our obsession with another’s behavior and begin to lead happier and a more manageable life.”

This is not about detaching your love for this person, but it is also about loving yourself and learning to be happy with the absence of this individual.

Someone currently using and being absent from the family can be very similar to burying a child with one exception.

Hope.

Parents, will many times, hold onto hope when they have not received news that their child died which can make that process of detachment more difficult.

“He is fine.”

“She will be home once she runs out of money.” “This is a phase.”

Hopefully, he or she does make it back, but during this hoping phase, this is a good time to start and learn to love yourself.

It is highly recommended that you get support through a self-help program like Al-Anon, meet with a therapist, and learn to heal from your grief and loss that may be negatively affecting your day to day life.

How is healthy love expressed? It starts by loving yourself.

What disease do you need to have that requires for you to have committed a crime to acquire? Judge Steven Bromberg who is currently a trial judge at Central court in Santa Ana. After that first meeting, we started going to lunch periodically and I realized that Judges are humans too.

He was interested in learning about addiction and I saw someone who actually cared about people. Honorable Judge Steven Bromberg: Changed My View of the Criminal Justice System.

In 2009, I opened a facility in Anaheim that was the most rewarding facility I could imagine.

The passion that drove me stemmed from my experience trying to meander my way through the hurdles of my legal issues.

I decided that I wanted to create a program that offered the same services you would get in a very expensive program at a cost that was more reasonable then $20,000 a month and even more at times.

I had the passion but I had no idea how I was going to do this. One idea that I had, which I was unsure on how well this was going to work was to walk into each courtroom in Orange County and give my card to the bailiff as I requested to meet with the judge.

With all of my years experiencing the courts as something ugly, I remember having this knot in my stomach and nothing was comfortable about doing this.

As I teach for New Creation College, this remined me of behavioral psychology. According to them, behavior is learned. Classical conditioning refers to what happens prior to learning that creates a response through pairing. It was first introduced by Ivan Pavlov and his famous dogs. During my entire life, I paired the court as a place of punishment.

As Pavlov rang the bell causing his dogs to salivate, I would see a Bailiff, a judge or a district attorney that caused my stomach to ache, and my chest would tighten.

After about three months of doing this, I came across a judge, and honestly the first judge who seemed to actually be interested in what we were doing.

I remember sitting down with him for the first time and expecting the typical what you do, how does it work, and thank you, the bailiff will see you out. But, I didn’t get that response.

Rosalyn’s goal is to bring results-driven focus to help individuals and organizations to improve the effectiveness of their message.

She is a professional speaker and has a few TED Talks under her belt.

She is the author of “Random Acts of Kindness,”

"Dogs and Roses: Reducing Stress and Anxiety in Today’s Troubled Times, " and her newest work is "A Message For Tomorrows Leaders." She has a program called “Reach out vs Strike Out.” a program directed towards stopping school violence.

She teaches Public Speaking and has taught Interpersonal Communication. She earned a master’s degree in Speech Communication from Cal State Northridge and earned her bachelor’s degree from UC Santa Barbara.

Patrick Chester, who has struggled with a behavioral addiction that has destroyed millions of lives and nearly ended his, as suicide became an option.

He Resorted to criminal acts to feed his addiction, and ultimately ended up in jail. He is 5 years free of that "monster" and has a new purpose in life. He spent many years taking from people to feed his sickness, now he gives back and it’s an amazing story!

Patrick Chester: Recovering Pathological Gambler. Lost Millions and Went to Jail.

When the word using is replaced with gambling, we can see that compulsion is not limited to psychoactive substances. Compulsive gamblers: think about gambling most of the time (compulsion)  (tolerance) as they increase the size of their bet restless and discontent when not gambling (which is a psychological withdrawal)  continue gambling regardless of how much they lose (denial says they believe they can control it and will gamble again, even after weeks of abstinence, particularly if they have money in their pocket. The specific behavioral addiction is a symptom of the addiction, not the illness. The illness is addiction.

Initially, gambling was recreational and pleasurable. Bets were small and consequences not so bad. Early on for most gamblers, a big win will fuel the craving to gamble.

Compulsive gambling is a progressive disease, and the main differences between problem and pathological gambling are time and money. Addictive behaviors alter brain chemistry in very similar ways as psychoactive drugs do and the reasons why people engage in a compulsive behaviors are the same reasons why people engage in compulsive drug use:

to get the rush, overcome boredom, forget problems, control anxiety and depression, and, to alter their state of consciousness